Ok, that didn't really happen. But I did make myself a chart chronicling my sleep loss. It was depressing so I peed on it.
Thousands of humans have asked us if we ever resorted to driving to calm him down. This usually caused Jared to curl up in the fetal position on the floor and mutter jibberish that might have meant "It never stops. Never, never stops!"
The screaming that went on from the second the car seat locked in to the second we killed the motor was enough to crack any terrorist. Hear that Obama? We will drive for our country.
It has become much better. He still has to be entertained or the peace ends fast. Yesterday I gave Phin a jar to play with on our way home from picking up take out.
"Mel, did you get a peanut dish?"
"Nooo. I got, oh crap."
"What?"
"I gave Phin a jar of peanut butter to play with, but he can't open lids."
This point Jared leans back to glance at Phin.
"He can open lids."
"Oh crap."
That is too funny. He looks cute all messy at least!
ReplyDeleteLOL this morning I chanced giving my lil one silly putty to play with while I drove, the whole time praying that she wouldn't think it was food.
ReplyDeleteAudrey - That's exactly how I consoled myself. "At least he doesn't look half bad covered in nuts."
ReplyDeleteJAG- I just assume anything I had him will be ingested. The day he doesn't put inedible objects in to his mouth, I'll throw a party!
That is so freaking funny! The photo absolutely priceless. CLASSIC!
ReplyDeleteHAHA! Oh my goodness! That is soooooooooo funny! I love it! "he can open lids" I can't even imagine how hard you guys must have laughed....:)
ReplyDeleteThis is HYSTERICAL! I seriously laughed out loud for a few solid minutes at work- hahaha! Wow, so glad you stopped by my blog and that I got a chance to stop by yours. I am in stitches right now... "Once I even compiled a beautiful graph showing him all the benefits of REM shut eye. He peed on it." Oh gosh. Wow, thanks for the laugh! I can't wait to read more from you! Have a great weekend. :)
ReplyDeleteOh no!! I love his little face - as if to say "have you got a problem with the peanut butter all over me??" And it's definitely a photo to show future girlfriends!!
ReplyDeleteI love reading your blog posts, you're such a great, and funny writer!
xx
ps: a den is British English (I think) for a fort. We basically built a fort in our garden, with bed sheets, the shed door and a clothes airer. It was too hot to sit directly in the sun, and we don't have a parasol, so a fort was the next best thing (and way more fun!)
ohhhh my goshhhh. that is hilarious slash sucks. your car is gonna smell like peanuts for dayyyyys mellyb. hope you like peanut butter! hahaha.
ReplyDelete(i really am sympathetic even if you can't tell)
Red - You have fort in your garden?! That's awesome! Your babe is going to have so much fun with you two.
ReplyDeleteBridget- You have no idea. I smell like peanut butter. Phin smells like peanut butter. The whole friggen street has a faint peanuty smell. It's going to take a while for me to want a pb & j.